Girl Talk With Sue Richards

Pony disapproves of Sue's skanky ways.

Pony disapproves of Sue’s skanky ways.

Sadly, this is our Yom Kippur post.

It evolved rapidly, and with a real attachment to the holiday, and events this week. Recently, at the comic book store, a debate was had about Superman looking completely chiseled. This is stupid. Why? Superman can’t possibly find challenging exercise, given his massive level of super strength.

Aquaman and Namor however, are CONSTANTLY swimming. Michael Phelps swims a lot, and looks like Michael Phelps. Aquaman and Namor, in fact, any Pesco American…all they do is swim. Beyond chiseled. BEYOND.

So, a few days pass, and I’m thinking about the Saturday, or in this case weekend, post. I didn’t really want to do another introspective piece about cultural identity. That was fine ONCE. I did feel that our hero should make the observance that Alien Americans do, and punch some dolphins in the mouth. I didn’t want just another page of dolphins getting smacked, even though they are so, so smug.

Somehow that involved me in a search for images of Namor and Aquaman with Dolphins, which through the mystery of the internet, delivered me to a long, evidence driven discussion of Sue Richards from the Fantastic Four constantly cheating on Mr. Fantastic. This led to a different web search, where various other web artists chose to depict Sue stepping out one Reed to various degrees, from romantic to explicit.

This then, led to the punch line above, and a further discussion yesterday.

Wouldn’t Aquaman or Namor be kind of slimy? Or scaly? Or kind of smell fishy? None of these things are a turn on, unless you are Sue Richards, apparently.

Ironically, just before I posted this, I checked the site stats, and another FF related post, about Ben Grimm discriminating against Pesco Americans, has gotten huge traffic today. Considering that Ben is Jewish, that takes us full circle, back to Yom Kippur.

Tomorrow: Lonely are the Darths!

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