“If I Could Save Time In A Bottle…”

Seriously, this is a thing we are doing.  Like, today.

Seriously, this is a thing we are doing. Like, today.

My friend has tons of ideas. Not all of them are very viable, some of them are great but costly, and some of them immediately have the foundation of a “project” inside them. This is one of the final category. We were sitting around, having margaritas, and I was having my nails done. He observed, “tequila doesn’t age in the bottle, huh? It doesn’t get better sitting in the bottle, just in the barrel.”

This was a correct observation. It rapidly led to a sort of boring lecture from me on how aging happens, and how it is similar to other processes. He asked the key question, that i had never considered: “Could you make it age faster? It’s just a physical process, right?”

The question had tons of genius in it. My mind reeled, and quickly conceived of a method by which we could in fact “mechanically age” an alcohol. I explained it, and very quickly, the concept of attempting this task captured our imaginations. I guess it wasn’t that hard to do, since our imaginations had already had a margarita each.

Today, we are implementing the plan. There are variables involved that we don’t know, so it is in fact, a true experiment. We do know that moonshiners on the internet swear by a similar process, while simultaneously guarding the secrets of that process.

Well, @#$% ’em. We have a ridiculous number of higher degrees between the three of us, and some of those degrees are in Sciences. I’m not thinking it’s going to take long to iron out the kinks. As with anything, there are naysayers, like Reed Richards above. Thankfully, most of our naysayers have been told to shut the @#$% up, we are doing Science.

Oh…and for those of us that didn’t grasp the header…we are literally bottling the effects of time on tequila at a faster rate, effectively saving time in the bottle. Clever, eh?

Next Issue: Bonus Sunday Post! Be There!

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